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Disobedience

During this time of year, I love to sleep with my windows open at night. The air is crisp, clean, fresh and the sound of the leaves rustling on the ground relaxes me as the cool breeze chills my body. LOVELY
I was awakened at 8:28 this morning, and I immediately  began to make a checklist as to how many things I 'had' to do today. Some of which are things that I didn't get around to yesterday. So as I began to stretch my aching and tense body, He told me that I should go and take a jog or walk. My initial thought was to say " I'll do it later" and " I have to finish cleaning this house... blah blah blah... " , but there His voice was again " Get dressed and go for a walk" , Finally I obliged and got dressed kissed my husband and went about my way.
So, today is the first day in a LONG time that I've had a morning walk with God and focused only on Him.
One of my first thoughts that crossed my mind as I walked with Him was a question that I've asked myself , "Krystal, why are you disobedient? Why do I question so many things that God has asked me to do?".. If you follow me on Facebook.. you'll see my post this morning questioned how far we'd go if we just obeyed instead of questioned.
The first thing that came to mind when I asked myself this question was, I don't always do this purposely
Ok.. how are you not purposely disobedient? When your earthly mother or father instructs you to do something, their instructions are loud and clear, and you definitely know it was them that instructed you to do something. You can touch them and you have them right there in front of you to hold you accountable. They are there to discipline you when you are disobedient and  you can see the disappointment or anger on their face when you don't listen. So, what's different when it comes from God?
Many of us don't recognize His voice. (I include myself with the 'us' that don't understand-- this is something that I am still working on at this very moment). Why is that? As I began to ponder this , the following came to mind,
God lives in our hearts..  How often is it that your heart tells you to do something, more specifically something positive. The voice from your heart is sounds clear and pure. An example of this is God telling me that I should write and get back in shape. (Which you'll see I'll have a post about getting back into shape later today). I found every reason not to work out and eat healthy. I even convinced myself that there was nothing wrong with over indulging in foods that I "deprived" myself from for "soooo"  long. I even felt that it couldn't be God telling me to get back into shape. I said that I didn't have time, although I made time to watch my favorite television shows or walk around the craft store.
I've been told CLEARLY several times that I am here to write, inspire and teach. I even had a dream that told me to BLOG , but I found every excuse not to make the first step until now. I had the dream in 2006. Yes, I know I am bad. I am sure that I am not the only one, and hopefully there is someone out there that can take something from this. Even when I began to BLOG, I found every excuse to stop " No one is ever going to read this..." " You are wasting you time.. " " Your writing has lost its edge" .. " Your writing isn't as good as everyone else's". ---(oh... there's a statement that deserves its own post :) ) So clearly I've been pretty disobedient.
Back to my original answer of not knowing how to recognize His voice. God, never leads us in the wrong direction. He ALWAYS knows whats best for US better than we know for ourselves. We don't control ANYTHING! NOTHING! I think that once we get that through our thick skulls ( Including myself once again), I think life may become an easier ride. Think about when you used to ride the merry go round in elementary school. You had no control as to how fast or slow it went or even when it started or stopped. You could beg, plead or even try to stop it yourself, but ultimately you were at the mercy of who ever was spinning it. Right? The only thing you had control over is how you embraced or handled the ride that the person took you on. You had limited control as to whether you got sick or dizzy. Its the same concept as to which God controls our lives.
How often do we disobey our hearts, where God lives, and end up with heart ache? How often do we cry to God and wonder why He allows us to go through the pain? And despite the fact as to whether or not we obey Him, He's always there for us. Think about it, remember the time when you drank too much or ate too much, and as you cried out to God because your body was suffering the consequences of your decisions. (hmm... maybe another post as well :) )
Do you remember a time when you were younger and you knew exactly without a shadow of doubt what you wanted to do in life. Most of our hearts were pure and didn't have to question our desires. Me for example, I remember being excited about teaching others and there was a time that in church I had to explain what a bible verse meant to me, I was happy to explain (although I was shy), but I was always happy to play church and be the preacher or the teacher.. -- **DING DING DING** . One of my favorite hymns that I used to love to sing was a song that went " If I can help somebody... then my living will not be in vain".. **Ding ding**  A few years ago I felt on top of the world when I went to mentor young women in rehab.... I can't describe the feeling I felt when I was hugged and thanked as they left ---**DING DING DING DING**
So, why is it so UNBELIVABLE to me that I am here to teach and inspire others?  And the above examples are only a few examples of what I call "DUH moments"
One more thing, FEAR. FEAR is something that I speak about ofen and I even have a blog post dedicated to Comfort and Fear alone. But as I was walking this morning, I got an overwhelming sensation to close my eyes as I walked around a curve of the sidewalk in the park. There was no one around me and I was in no danger. Trust me I checked all around me and no one for miles. Despite the fact that I know that there are those that are sucking your teeth and rolling your eyes, I will continue to tell you what happened. There was a section of sidewalk , in the park, that I was told to close my eyes and trust that I'd stay on the path. I did it. Although, fear had me opening my eyes to check, but I stayed on the path and made it the 10 paces that I was asked to do blindly. Imagine what would happen if I blindly trusted God with all things in my life.

Looking forward to sharing more experiences of my walks with God , and I hope that I've encouraged you to go on a few of your own.

Be Blessed & Make it Great Day!

Krys :)

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